Need
by Penny Wishes
Summary: Ginny lives with Harry but Loves someone else... What would harry say if he knew I saw sugar-blonde hair instead of black?.. "I need you." "then come to me."


Rating: R for depressing themes, and implication of cutting etc.  
  
Summary: Ginny lives with Harry but her heart is still someone else's. How can you love the person your boyfriend killed? D/G  
  
A/N: Ok upon reading this you may find that it sounds like it's based on a song. (Not a song-fic though!) And that song doesn't belong to me. But I'm not telling you who it DOES belong to, because I don't like the artist and I don't really like the song all that much but in this case it is kind of the right song for the fic.  
  
Disclaimer: I only own the storyline. Everything else, not mine.   
  
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Need  
  
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She sighed lying across the white sheets of her bed. The white contrasted bluntly with her vibrant hair. She put her hands over her soft pale face, tear stained cheeks, wet eyelashes. She had dreamed about it again.   
  
Him standing over her, smiling,   
  
"And you, little gem, you will help the process you belong with me, with my kind." He whispered. "You will run the empire, once that Potter boy is gone, you will be my little queen, you will sit here," He pointed at the ornately carved chair snakes weaving throughout the design rubies embedded in the soft metal. He stepped back and took a seat in his own chair, as did another. Draco Malfoy took the chair on the other side of her own.   
  
He stared at her through squinted silver eyes. Ginny want to get up, but she couldn't, her body was too heavy, she was paralyzed. She wanted to touch the shiny sugar blonde hair.   
  
She sat up hating herself for thinking about the dream. They were gone, both of them. For God sakes, she LIVED with the man who killed them.   
  
Ginny wiped her eyes at the thought of Harry; he couldn't see her crying, not again. She stood and walked shakily over to the bathroom staring at herself in her mirror. She was getting so thin, sickly almost. His face, his eyes reflected in the mirror, but it was a different Draco, the one she met in the halls of school back when she was little, four years had passed, and still those eyes drove her crazy. Not looking at her directly but past her as if not finding anything worth focusing on.   
  
Notice me. She wanted to say.   
  
She closed her eyes and remembered the feeling of his long slender fingers entwined with her own.   
  
"Take her to the house! Now!" The Dark Lord had yelled, and as if by the force of his yell the long fingers had grasped her hand and he had started running, not looking at her not talking to her. Why did he always act like he didn't know her? As if they were strangers.   
  
He only slowed down when they reached the Riddle House; he pulled her into a little closet and shut the door behind them, muttering a little spell to keep the door closed.   
  
"Shhh," He had hissed, as Ginny had panted. She had tried to stop, but she was so out of breath. "Don't breath," He had hissed. She had tried to hold her breath, it was making her dizzy, she felt the ground move as she exhaled loudly. "Damn it." He had said before grabbing her by the shoulders and pulling her towards him.   
  
His lips devoured her breath and she passed out falling softly to the floor of the closet.   
  
Ginny shook her head touching her lips, She slid softly to the tiled floor, Why did this happen? She was supposed to be on the side of the good, she WAS on the side of the good, right? Her wings had failed her again.   
  
"Angel" Harry would call her, but did angels fall?   
  
She wrapped her arms around herself, feeling small and alone she closed her eyes, her mind wandering back to his haunting presence.   
  
"Don't leave," She had whispered when he had told her he was going into hiding. "I need you."   
  
She hated herself for pretending he was there. What would Harry do if he knew that every time she got into bed beside him she imagined the sugar-blonde hair, in place of his own black locks? What would he do if he knew she felt soft pail skin instead of his own beneath her fingers? It was the only way she could keep herself sane.  
  
I need you.   
  
"You have to move on." He had said. No emotion just words. How could he move on so easy?   
  
She had tried, she had tried to move on, put on wings for Harry, she had agreed to become his angel, but every time she tried to fly she fell.   
  
I need you.  
  
Her tears fell like rain as she stood in the shower trying to rinse away the memories.   
  
"It's my fault." She whispered to her hands as they ran soap over her body. Would he have forgiven her if he were alive?   
  
"Who is it Ginny? Who kidnapped you?" Harry had been crying, and she had really loved him for a second. Or at least his emotion. The steely silver eyes never showed emotion, nonchalant, uncaring silver eyes.   
  
"Draco Malfoy," She had whispered.   
  
She had watched as they pulled him away his long slender body rigid and cold, silver eyes staring at her.   
  
"I'm sorry!" She wanted to yell. His lips mouthed something to her but she couldn't make it out, her eyes were caught on his. Tears sliding down his cheeks.   
  
"It's my weakness that killed you," Ginny cried as she rinsed the soap from her long red hair.   
  
The towel felt like steel wool against her skin, scratching, and scraping. She saw blood running down soft pale skin. But it wasn't her own, it was his, his skin that bled as he was kicked and beaten. He bled as silent tears slid down his face.   
  
Ginny lay on the white sheets praying that the face, the eyes, the blood, would disappear from her mind. Her naked body shivered as the towel fell from it. She stared at the long scars marring her wrists.   
  
Scars reminding her that she wasn't the angel Harry wanted her to be. Reminding her that every time she tried to fly she fell. Ginny shivered curling herself into a ball she closed her eyes and his were there.   
  
I need you.   
  
"Then come to me."   
  
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"Yes sir, I'd like to report a murder." Harry whispered feeling tears fall down his cheeks.   
  
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Ok that was a little sad, I hope everyone understood it, I didn't use anything to divide the memories from the present tense, so I hope everyone caught the changes in the writing. I just think it flows better without any separation. Whether you love it or hate it please review!  
  
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